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(Cont'd)
Zoe, while highly imaginative and verbal, is also both aggressive
and fearful. The combination soon has some of the boys teasing
her at recess while other weaker members of the class also become
targets. Play becomes increasingly disrupted by power struggles,
bullying, and teasing. "When they are most vulnerable and
least confident of the positions they strive for," Katch
observes, "each of these children is most determined to
keep a newer child out. Must exclusion, I wonder, be the price
of a secure place in the group?"
As part of her quest, Katch interviews kids from a program
for troubled high school students. The stories and insights
of these teenagers‹a punk girl named Ashley, a boy continually
beat up by his peers, a girl of mixed race who has opted out
of groups entirely‹slowly transforms Katch's thinking and her
classroom work. She sees, for instance, how her tendency to
identify with the child who is being teased discourages dialogue
among the children who might learn from one another.
Katch's exploration is filtered through her own painful memories
of exclusion, including the intense teasing she endured at the
hands of her older brother and the awkwardness she felt at school
when she didn't seem to fit in with the group. "I still
dream that I am at a cocktail party," she reflects, "finally
looking great in a slinky black dress, only to look down and
realize I am wearing the red tie shoes of my childhood, caught
again in the act of pretending to belong."
Ultimately Katch sees that the only way to address social cruelty
is to create moral schools in which the school community invests
in an ongoing process to clarify its expectations for how people
treat one another. Adults, says Katch, must work to help children
develop language to talk about their feelings, even seemingly
unacceptable ones. "It is the essential, ongoing conversations
with adults and with children about what is fair and what is
moral that will, over time," she writes, "help children
resist the impulse to tease and bully and will help them have
the language and the conviction to resist it when it does occur."
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